Friday, October 28, 2022
Feast of Saints Simon and Jude, Apostles
           (click here to listen to or read today’s scriptures)
In my dream
The heavens declare the glory of God, and the firmament proclaims his handiwork. Day pours out the word to day, and night to night imparts knowledge.
In my dream everything is fine. Pam and Margaret and I head for the hospital, where a procedure is scheduled for me. In the pre-op room a nurse gives me something to drink, and I drink it quickly without tasting it much. 6 ounces of citrus liquid, to make the surgery easier. Then I have to go to the bathroom, but instead of going to the bathroom I leave and drive my car to downtown … Indianapolis? Austin? I find a parking spot that I think I’ll remember, in an alley not far from a busy street. Then the losing begins.
Brothers and sisters, you are no longer strangers and sojourners, but you are fellow citizens with the holy ones and members of the household of God.
This dream is familiar, but it’s been awhile. Early morning sleep has given it space to rise again. I’m always lost in one way or another. This time the losing is a gradual thing. First the car. I have no idea where it is, and looking for it makes me more lost than before. But I have my phone, and I was going to call Pam and Margaret, who must be frantic. But I don’t, because I’m surrounded by a great group of young people, partying, having a great time. Then I realize I no longer have my phone. Where did it go? I feel more panic.
At some point I move into a neighborhood, quieter, small houses, yards, and I think I’ll find help there. But I end up walking back into the city. People eat, order food and beer, talking, laughing, I move through them all like a ghost.
Through God the whole structure is held together and grows into a temple sacred in the Lord.
I walked into a park, filled with kids. We are too heavy as a group, and slowly the edge of the park breaks off and tips over into the air, and flips 360 degrees with all the people still on it. No one fell off, no one seemed scared, just excited. Wow! After it flipped back to the right side, it landed softly and everything continued as before.
In him you also are being built together into a dwelling place of God in the Spirit.
I have a bag of leftover snacks. Others around me have snacks like that, too. I remember in a rush all the plans for surgery and realize what I’ve done, leaving Margaret and Pam. I look for older people to help me. A couple of men seem to want to help, but I ask to use their cell phone and they ignore the request. But then I see Millie my friend from Waynesville, with her daughter.
I need help, I said to Millie. I really need your help. She is concerned. Can I use your cell phone?
Sure. She gets out her cell phone case, but the phone is missing.
Throughout the dream I replay the area where I parked the car in my mind. I feel suspicious of the young people around me. Occasionally someone is alone, looking a little lost like I am.
Millie is unconcerned about her phone. She will find it in her purse, she thinks.
Not a word nor a discourse whose voice is not heard, through all the earth their voice resounds, and to the ends of the earth, their message.
Then I wake up, breathing hard, frightened. I realize I’ve been dreaming for the last forty-five minutes, since I decided to sleep a little longer in the morning.
I’m grateful to be awake, and to have not been lost in a big city as it’s getting dark, with thousands of young people having a party time around me while I’m desperate. No car. No cell phone. Margaret and Pam frightened for me, wanting to find me, helpless. And I can’t help them … help me.
Jesus went up the mountain to pray, and he spent the night in prayer to God. When day came …
Upon awakening, I realize how much I think I’m dependent on car and phone, not to speak of wallet. I know I’m only dependent on God, but I don’t remember praying in the dream, or remembering to pray. I want to be dependent on others, and I was … on friends like Margaret and Pam and Millie. But I seemed afraid of the others, or they ignored me. I felt afraid and alone, among these so-called strangers. But we don’t need to be strangers for long – we are children of God together. I wish I’d felt that, known that, in my dream.
Lately this recurring type of dream has left me. Last night it returned in a crescendo, and I woke up shaking, praying, so glad to be me, here, free, full of the goodness of today.
Everything is fine.
(Ephesians 2, Psalm 19, Luke 6)
(posted at www.davesandel.net)
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