Saturday, May 14, 2022
Feast of Saint Matthias, Apostle
           (click here to listen to or read today’s scriptures)
God is good and God is humble
From the rising to the setting of the sun is the name of the Lord to be praised. High above all nations is the Lord; above the heavens is his glory.
Andi gave me a small book by John Burke called What’s After Life?
It was impossibly bright; it was like a million welders’ lamps all blazing at once. And right in the middle of my amazement came a prosaic thought, “I’m glad I don’t have physical eyes at this moment. This light would destroy the retina in a split second.”
No. Not a light. This was a MAN made out of light. HE would be too bright to look at. A command formed itself in my mind. “Stand up!” I got to my feet and then came the stupendous certainty: You are in the presence of THE Son of God …
And here we are, enjoying our Saturday morning, quite as completely in the presence of THE Son of God as the man who nearly died, but entirely unaware. It’s me, O Lord. I am unaware. I am aware of my sore night muscles and my breakfast hunger, of the sleep still hanging from my eyes. I am aware of our plans for the day.
But even in my unawareness, I pray my prayer, the Lord’s Prayer, and thank Jesus for the day. I want to catch the wave. I want to be ready, waiting on the shore when the wave comes.
Jesus said, “Remain in my love. Keep my commandments, just as I have kept the Father’s commandments. And this is my commandment: love one another as I love you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
Jesus will be dying in a few hours, laying down his life for his friends. They have no idea. But they love him as best they can in their unawareness. I do the same. It’s later, when rubber hits the road, that I will become aware of Jesus right here inside me. When I choose sacrifice, when I give what otherwise is “rightfully” mine to another one of God’s sons and daughters, when I die for my friend, Jesus wrestles me to the ground and whispers in my ear, “Well done, good and faithful servant. You have remained in my love.”
That’s what I imagine, anyway. What I hope for. Still, it’s God’s world and God’s rules and God knows me better than I know myself. He’s in charge of Kairos time.
Listening yesterday to a short talk from Richard Rohr that my friend Steve sent me, I heard a few wise words from St. Francis’ scholar friend Bonaventure. Bonaventure said that if I seek God I should:
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- Ask for grace, not instruction
- Ask for desire, not understanding
- Ask for the groanings of prayer, not diligence in reading
- Ask God to be my spouse, not my teacher
- Ask for darkness, not for clarity
Bonaventure said that God is good, and God is humble. In God’s humility he will teach me to be his humble companion, and in that humble relationship I will learn all I can learn about loving and being loved.
It was not you who chose me, but I who chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit that will remain, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give you.
(posted at www.davesandel.net)
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