Friday, August 7, 2020
The reason I have two ears
There are two kinds of revelation in my life. Amidst the mundane everyday days, blessings fall. God sightings. Miracles. A parking place found. A baby’s fever breaks. Someone begins to breathe again after hours of obvious death. At just the right time, the pregnant mother’s water bursts.
I find my keys.
And the second kind of revelation? That would be when Coach God sees promise in little old me and decides to push me a little. These are God moments, except God isn’t to be seen. Dark night. Moments of doubt. Watching and waiting and finding no thing from God, no words, no emotional relief, no hearts … but as Job cried out into the dark, “I know that my Redeemer liveth!” You just know.
I think that, given these two kinds of revelation, I need no further purpose or direction. Of course I can ask God how I should live my life, but the word BIBLE is short for “Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth.” Right? What else is there to say?
And so whether I hear from God when I seek him in despair, or whether I do not, I can learn to rest easy and know how much I’m loved, and wait for him at the gate.
Job discovered how much God loved him even as he lost everything. His wife lost everything too, and learned nothing. God finally showed himself to Job, after his mountain of suffering. God does not always show himself even then.
Does my suffering mean I’ve failed or done something wrong, as Job’s friend Eliphaz said? Or maybe God is testing me, as Bildad wondered? Could God just be arbitrary and cruel, which Zophar thought might be true? Does God not even exist? Should I simply accept value in my existence, without explanation or future?
The Israelites had no idea. The Ninevites had no idea.
The Lord will restore the vine of Jacob though ravagers have ruined the tendrils.
Stumble upon endless bodies, warriors of Nineveh, you are destroyed!
I will bring both death and life,
I will inflict wounds and I will heal them.
Always both-and, always the gift today and gone tomorrow. Is this the fault of God? He is responsible. Can God be what we call reckless with his children? Can he really? Should we not speak up and call God out, then repent of our hubris before we call Him out again?
Jesus has an angle on this puzzle.
Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness
For theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.
Isn’t this too simple?
Whoever wishes to save his life must lose it
Whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.
Stop waiting for God-sightings and miracles. Stop beating yourself up for your sins or blaming yourself for God’s supposed silence. Settle down and wait for God to come through the gate. Give all you have to the sick man on the side of the road. Breathe in, breathe out, that is more than enough.
What does it profit a man, if he were to gain the whole world but forfeit his soul?
What am I living for? When all my hopes and dreams have shattered on the hard hallway floor, what do I have left?
I have my soul!
(Nahum 2, 3, Deuteronomy 32, Matthew 5, Matthew 16)
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