Today’s readings: Click on today’s date at http://www.usccb.org/bible/
Make me willing, Lord, not willful
Wednesday, April 2, 2014
Wednesday of the Fourth Week of Lent
John 5:30
Jesus said, “I do not seek my own will but the will of the one who sent me.”
Noah’s cinema-nemesis Tubal-Cain cries out to God as leader of his people, “I am a man, made in Your image! Why will you not converse with me? We are orphan children.”
Isaiah implies that God asks for the same chance to communicate: “Come, let us reason together, says the Lord” (Isaiah 1:18).
Obedience essentially means to listen and then respond to what I hear. But if I hear nothing? What then? Have either of us even come to the table? Are my ears the problem, or is God whispering too softly?
Do I filter what God says to me through my own will? Tubal-Cain argues with Noah, “A man isn’t ruled by the heavens. He is ruled by his will.” This in contrast with Jesus, who forsakes his own will to obey the will of his Father.
Borrowing terms from Gerald May (Will and Spirit), my Transforming Center friend Steve Wiens writes in his blog, “I know I am being willful when I am interrupting people or worse, simply waiting for them to be finished with their sentence. Willfulness insists, goads, cajoles and pushes.”
There is a better way. “I know I am being willing when I can sit back in my seat and actually listen. Willingness listens, responds, initiates, and wonders.”
This willingness might be what opens my ears to the whisper of God.
It also shuts my mouth. Steve continues, “People can sense willfulness. They feel like they’re being forced. But people can also sense willingness. Willfulness sounds like a demand; willingness sounds like an invitation. And true willingness isn’t just getting good at figuring out a way to get what you want in a nice way, like a benevolent dictator. That’s manipulation.”
God’s willingness sets the path for us. In today’s reading from Isaiah 49, God pleads: “Prisoners, come out! Those in darkness, show yourselves! I will cut a road through all my mountains and make my highways level.”
The Atlantic calls Noah “a heartfelt, personal plea for the reconciliation of often-competing moral codes.”  We fight for our codes. Our way is willful and competitive. We emphasize our disagreements. God’s way is to listen and not compete, find ways to love, agree, be true together. God pleads: let us come and reason together, and recover the ways we recognize each other. God is willing and invites us to be willing with him.
Make me willing, Lord, not willful. Fill my lungs with the words, the breath prayer of an old rebel slowing learning the art of obedire, listening for all the ways I can obey. When the word grates against my teeth, quiet my mouth and let me just … breathe.
Steve Wiens’ blog is called The Actual Pastor. He writes often. There’s a cool bio and several sermon videos.   Here’s the link: http://www.stevewiens.com/
http://www.christiancounselingservice.com/archived_devotions.php?article_id=1263
